It is a warm summer evening. My husband and I are sitting in our nice air-conditioned apartment. He has been playing a computer game and I have been cross-stitching. As we sit here quietly tonight, our physical hunger satisfied a couple of hours ago by a delicious dinner he prepared for me, we can hear the sounds of our neighbor’s children playing outside. The oldest is a boy of around 4 or 5 years, the youngest is just a little toddler. Occasionally we hear the sounds of crying or loud fussing, but mostly it is the sound of cheerful shouts and exclamations, and the proud ringing of the new bell on the boys bicycle. It is a wonderful warm summer evening and makes me think of days such as these when I was a child.
My sister gave me the cross-stitch kit I am working on several years ago. I think it was in response to my saying how much I liked the pattern. “North American Beauties. Michael Adams’ stunning white-on-white collage has captured the beauty and dignity of a few of North America’s treasured animals.” Copyright 1994 Dimensions, Inc. Yes, I really liked the pattern when I saw it, but I had never done such a detailed cross-stitch before. And yes, it is white-on-white. Much of the white canvas is left unstitched, while the main colors are all pastel, with just a few darker colors used for the eyes, noses and other highlights, as well as the outlines. Pastel blues, pastel grays, cream, pale lavender. The colors are cool, but when I look at the sample photo of the finished project, I don’t feel cold, I feel calm inside. These colors are soothing to my soul. The animals represented are animals that I enjoy looking at and learning about, animals I associate with living in Alaska. So – why has it taken me almost 10 years to finish this cross-stitch?
Oh my! I think it’s been 10 years. Maybe it has been longer. I know I worked on it when we vacationed in Egypt more than 6 years ago, and I already had about a third of it finished at that point. But over the years, my eyesight has continued to degenerate, due to severe myopia, tears in the retinas and now good old presbyopia. Old age eyes. The worse my eyes got, the less I wanted to cross-stitch and do other detailed work. (More on that in another blog post.) My sister has asked me a number of times, are you ever going to finish the cross-stitch that I sent you? And I think of it sitting in it’s plastic bag in the basket in the little hall between the livingroom and the bedroom and I cringe inside. Guilt. Uh oh – a piece of cloth and some thread are making me feel guilty? This is not good! Very quickly my guilty mind reminds me of the other projects I have that are sitting in that basket, or under the bed in various boxes, projects that were also started and left half finished because I got tired of them. My sister writes to me and says: send ME the cross-stitch and I will finish it for you. My sister, whom I call a “master cross-stitcher, an expert.” My sister who could have finished it within six months of purchase now wonders what is taking me so long!
I sat down and made a list of projects that I know I have here, many started already. I was shocked to find out how many there are. If I included the ones not begun, I have at least 15 projects. I looked at the list and decided I needed to prioritize and finish some of them! All of them. Before I die. Before they are left for someone to go through and say, “Why in the world did she never finish anything she started?”
I immediately started working on finishing the embroidered dresser scarf I had started while we were in the States last year. I planned to give it to my Russian tutor. I started it while waiting for laundry to wash and dry at various Laundromats as we traveled around the States, visiting our supporting churches. Every time I worked on it, I prayed for her and for her family in Moscow. I set my timer for 45 minutes and began. And many 45 minutes later – I finished it, hemmed with lace and all. I was surprised at how little time it actually took when I spent a solid 45 minutes at a time working on it. Time in the evenings when Mel was watching a video, or reading silently or aloud to me, or during a 45-minute break in the afternoon in-between other life jobs. Forty-five minutes at a time when I would think of Lyudmilla and pray for her. She was delighted when I gave it to her – honestly delighted. I rejoiced inside.
I had decided that this cross-stitch would be the next project I will finish. Forty-five minutes at a time, it is slowly progressing. Actually, at the rate I am going, I will finish it before next week has passed. I am enjoying finishing it. It is not a chore. It is not something I have to do. I feel like I am accomplishing something that I am going to treasure. When this project is finished, I will frame it and it will go on my wall. I am looking forward to looking at it up there.
And I will cross one more project off the list. I already have the third one in mind. For August. Ha ha!
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