Monday Morning Musings

I have not taken a shower since I wrote about our shower/faucet/kalunka last time. Mel and I were talking about it just a bit ago while I was adding more water to the washing machine. (I've written before how I always add water to this water-saver washer.) I was adding hot water since it was a load of whites, checking the temperature of the water off and on and listening very, very carefully to the water pressure as the water went through the kalunka. Standing there in the kitchen, if the kalunka had exploded, I would have been hit with a blast of steam and very hot metal. As Mel and I talked about the shower, I just burst into tears.

I guess I was more traumatized than I realized.

Is this like the proverbial getting bucked off a horse? Do I need to get right back on? Do I need to just get in there and take a shower? Mel has jury-rigged the nozzel so it hangs on a couple wires now. I won't have to hold it or hang it over my shoulder again. Hopefully.

I don't know. I do NOT want to ever take a shower in there again. That's all I DO know. Mel suggested I put a stool in the tub and just sit there and take a bath instead. (With the deeper depth of the tub, my size, the arthritis in my hands and having new knees, I can't sit in the tub and then get out. I love my new knees, but there are some real drawbacks to not being able to kneel on them any more. Imagine never kneeling on your knees again... I never realized how much we do that until I couldn't do it any more. Oh, getting older is no fun sometimes!!) I have a stool I can try - just not right now.

This all makes me feel more than a little depressed. And angry still. But who am I angry at? What am I angry at? I don't know. Terrified. Yes, that is a word that also applies.

Sigh.

So, I think to myself - have you prayed about this? And that opens up all sorts of things in my mind. Maybe I'm just angry at God for allowing this to happen in the first place. Maybe I'm angry that we have to put up with a stupid kalunka at all - if there can be very nice workable systems in other parts of the world, why is it like this here? Maybe I'm just angry at God for a whole lot of things here in Ukraine.

Do I even want to go there? No. Not right now. But I will.

A young woman talked to me a church yesterday. She is very hurt - emotionally and spiritually - by the actions of a professing Christian man. This man has hurt a lot of people in the church. The pain goes on and on. A liar. A thief. A swindler. A sham. A charming charismatic personality. A fake. And this young woman now "needs a rest" from using her spiritual gifts within the church. She is correct. She needs to rest and recooperate - both emotionally and spiritually. I told her that - but added "don't rest too long". She laughed because she understood what I was saying. I realized that I am still angry at the person who did this to her and to so many others. It's been going on for a long time and the pain and damage has just escalated. People on both sides of the pond have been hurt - but people here have been devastated.

Why, God? Why have you allowed this to happen? I do not understand. And I am angry - still. For how many years now? 5? 6? Oh! God - STOP him!!!

And yet - maybe that is exactly what is happening now. In my human understanding it sure seems to have taken God a long time to act. But maybe God has just allowed him to reach a depth that shows to everyone what he is. All I know for sure is that I am still angry and this young woman is another victim and it is going to take time for her to heal. I wonder about this man, and his own family, and I wonder - is this a blatant example of what an apostate is?

Hebrews 6:4-12
It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the Holy Spirit, who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the coming age, if they fall away, to be brought back to repentance, because to their loss they are crucifying the Son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace.

Land that drinks in the rain often falling on it and that produces a crop useful to those for whom it is farmed receives the blessing of God. But land that produces thorns and thistles is worthless and is in danger of being cursed. In the end it will be burned.

Even though we speak like this, dear friends, we are confident of better things in your case—things that accompany salvation. God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, in order to make your hope sure. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.

Another young family is once again without an income. The husband has lost another job. I know no details at this time. All I know is that they barely had enough money to buy food to start with. Now - what are they going to do? My heart aches for them.

God - what are you doing? Can't You give them a break?

So, I am angry over our shower and the kalunka. And I am angry over other things here in Ukraine. And I am concerned. Anger seems to define our world right now. Anger - acted out, turned inward (depression), guiding so many people through their days. We live in an angry world. And I am part of that.

This is not good.

Ephesians 4:17-32
So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.
You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Forgiving each other. whew. Bucket of cold water in the face - but then I wonder - if this man is not a Believer anyway, but an apostate...do I have to forgive him? ha ha (not funny). And - do I have to forgive the kalunka, too? ei yi yi. And, do I have to forgive God for what He is doing in other people's lives? NO!!! Not forgiveness, but submission.

And submission is so very, very hard.

Sigh. I'm so looking forward to heaven.

Burned

I HATE our kalunka. And I HATE the funky new faucet/shower head that was put on while we were in the States. And I HATE the water schedule we are on here in Kherson. And I am not happy at all that I got burned this morning while taking a shower - FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON AT ALL!!!.

I am so thankful that Mel was here and came running when I started yelling at the top of my lungs, "MEL!! MEL!!!" Almost screaming. It happened so fast. I had the stupid new shower head slung over my shoulder while I put conditioner in my already washed hair. Why was it over my shoulder? Because it cannot attach to the post on the wall. The hose is too short and there is no hook to hang it with. I HATE IT. (note: the tub was coated or painted with something that makes it kind of rough - it's not a smooth tub. Therefore, the rust in the water stains it and I have to use a scrub brush and a rust remover to get the stain out. I only do that a few times a year. The grout has looked like that since we moved in - no matter what I've tried on it.)

I knew the split second the water pressure in the hose fluctuated that I was in trouble. It takes a micro-second for the water to turn to steam in the kalunka. By the time I reached up and jerked it off of me, the metal parts were already almost too hot to touch and the water was boiling. I have a huge red streak from my shoulder down the side of my back and on to my hip now. I tossed the shower head over toward the faucet, but it was still spraying hot water, so I reached to flip off the on/off lever and it was steam. Mel, by that time, was in the kitchen and had turned off the kalunka flame and made sure that the water really was on full force. This STUPID new faucet has this STUPID inconvenient lever that flips up or down for faucet or shower, or sideways for off. With the arthritis in my thumbs and hands now, flipping it is difficult to do, especially fast. So, now not only does my back hurt, my hand is throbbing.

"I am not happy, Bob." I am not happy at all. Angry. Mad. Hurt. Traumatized. Crying. I will NEVER take another shower, ever, ever again, without Mel here. NEVER. I thank God he WAS here and was able to get the kalunka off before it exploded. Last time Mel was gone for several days, I braved it and took a very lukewarm shower. Never again. I have no idea what happened this time! The water to our flat never went off, and as far as I could tell, the pressure didn't change either.

So, I am burned and I am mad. ANGRY. And I HATE that whole stupid shower, and especially that horrible new faucet/shower head.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrr.

PS - not only is the lever a pain in the ..., but look how long that thing is! It stickes out about 1/4 of the way into the tub, so the water is either running all over the edge (leaking behind the tiles??) and down the side of the tub to the right, on the floor to the left, or the metal is hitting you on the legs while you stand in there. STUPID. STUPID. STUPID.

Why Me??

So, tell me - WHY is it ALWAYS me who is in the shower when the water goes off, or the pressure gets really, really low? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Mel took a shower today around noon. I got in soon after he was finished. Shampooed my hair, rinsed it, covered it in conditioner, lathered up the rest of me with a nice grapefruit scented shower gel and - poof! Water went down to a suddenly scalding trickle in about 3 seconds.

I yelled. Mel yelled back from the living room. I yelled again, almost in a panic. (Bet we sounded great to the neighbors.) He went running into the kitchen and turned off the kalunka (water heater). I'd already turned off the shower nozel and the water was trickling out the faucet. I was standing as far away from it all as I could, afraid I was going to get burned.

Suddenly the pressure came back up, the water went from scalding to ice cold in about 3 seconds. Mel turned the kalunka back on and I very, very, very quickly finished my shower while he stood there and watched the kalunka 'just in case'. (The kalunka is not all that entertaining to watch, believe me!)

I love being in the States where showers are normal. Where water pressure is constant (well, it does vary a bit at my parents due to the pump and well). Where I have never, ever, never had the water suddenly turn to steam or scalding water in the middle of a shower. I love showers in America.

I'm dreaming of a long, hot American shower.......

Gas - A Hint At What Is To Come?

According to FoxNews this morning, Russia has cut off gas supplies again to Ukraine - Russia's Gazprom Cuts Gas Supplies to Ukraine. This is not the first time, nor the last time would be my guess. Sigh.

It has been cold all winter because our ZhEK/privitization group has not turned the gas up enough to keep it even 65 degrees in our flat. Each morning when Mel gets up the temp in our living room is between 60 and 64 degrees, depending on how cold it is outside. It could soon be much cooler than that. I am finally starting to get accustomed to temps in the mid-60's so maybe my body is readjusting from the surgery last year back to the way it used to be. I sure hope so!

Here is a photo of the flame in our kalunka: Looking back at a couple photos I took the last time our gas was very low (see my post, And I Wonder Why...), it appears that so far after 3 hours our gas is still better than it was before. But it's only been 3 hours. :) :) :) We'll see what the flame looks like in two days or a week, if the crisis goes that long.

This is Russia's way of saying to Ukraine: Happy New Year!

And I Wonder Why....

it takes so long to simply boil a pot of water to cook spaghetti or macaroni! These 3 photos show how bad our gas is tonight. What doesn't show are all of the hissing and popping sounds from the air that is mixed in the gas being released, and the little sparks from substances that are in the gas and catch fire as they are released. Gas is paid for by the amount used, supposedly, so adding air to it means someone is making money somewhere!

pilot light in the kalunka (a kulunka is a water heater that hangs on the wall above and between the sink and the stove)
(ignore the string, it sneaked up there and hid until after I'd already finished cooking dinner and couldn't retake this photo without it! silly little thing)

The Water Saga Continues

Water.

The water came back on Friday morning. Just a trickle at first. By noon it was a stronger trickle. Mel decided to attempt a shower.

We have a kalunka. I just love that word! Saying it sounds a lot like imitating an old fashioned cash register. You walk into the store and look at all of the items for sale on the shelves behind the counters, or in barrels placed here and there throughout the room. The warm smell of dusty floorboards and vinegary pickles fills your nostrils. You decide you need a can of beans, a spool of thread and maybe some ammunition for your .22 rifle (rabbit hunting, you know). You tell the person behind the counter what you want and he or his assistant gets everything off the shelves behind the counters (except the ammunition of course, it’s under one of the counters) and piles it next to the cash register. He picks up the first item and turns to the register. With authority, he pushes the lever marked 5 cents down and that wonderful sound happens as the price pops up in the little window on top of the machine. Ka-lunk. (Or maybe it is ker-chunk – but that doesn’t fit in my imaginary story!) This is one of those funny words that I enjoy saying – it just kind of rolls off my tongue in a mix of hard and soft sounds - kalunka.

What in the world is a kalunka and why am I going on and on about it? {smile} I can’t find the word in our Russian-English dictionary this morning and Mel thinks it’s been adopted into the language here from Polish or some other language. The speakers that are used to amplify the music at church are also called kalunkas, but usually when I hear the word I think – water heater. Now I have finally made it back to my first paragraph.

We had a stronger trickle of water on Friday at noon, so Mel decided to try to take a shower. He turned the water on in the kitchen. The water comes into our flat through a pipe in the toilet room that comes up through the floor and disappears into the ceiling. About a foot from the floor there is a T intersection where a second pipe attaches to that main little pipe. The second pipe travels behind the toilet (where another T intersection diverts water to the toilet), through the wall into the banya (bath room) where the third T intersection occurs, diverting water to the sink and to the bathtub/shower. Finally, the pipe travels through a second wall into the kitchen. In the kitchen it hides behind the sink for 3 feet or so before taking a 90 degree turn straight up the wall for another 3+ or 4 feet and disappears inside the kalunka. The pipe is clearly visible the whole way, except where it goes through walls and behind the bathtub and sink cabinet. I just love pipe décor – not! But I’m glad it is out in the open because so often pipes spring leaks. When Mel turned the water on in the kitchen, the water started flowing through the kalunka and out of the kitchen sink faucet. Very carefully, he then turned on the kalunka.

The gas pressure has been very low (Ukraine and Russia continue to argue about Ukraine stealing gas and not paying enough for what she legally uses – and the gas is so bad that often it produces only a sputtering and hissing yellow flame with just a tiny blue dot at the base of the flame). Because the gas is so low, the pilot light is tiny and does not always immediately light the flame. Gas builds up inside the kalunka until it finally reaches the pilot light and explodes in a whomp that can be felt all over the flat at the sudden changes of expanding and contracting air pressure (but I hope not in the flats above or below us!). It always scares me when it happens because that thing could really explode and we’d all meet each other in heaven afterward. The kalunka whomped and Mel set the dial at the lowest possible setting. If the flame is high and the water pressure is low, the water does not move through the pipes inside the kalunka fast enough and it begins to boil. If it boils it will turn to steam very fast – at the blink of an eye fast. Then the kalunka starts shaking on the wall and one of us lets out a yell. My heart starts racing and I panic and the one who is not showering at the time dashes madly into the kitchen to turn the flame completely off (this is another possible “I’ll meet you in heaven” situation). It takes several minutes before the pipe cools down enough that steam stops coming out of all the faucets. Steam coming out of the shower head while you are taking a shower is not fun, believe me! It’s happened to me twice and I thank God I realized fast enough what was beginning to happen that I turned the shower lever off quickly enough not to get burned (screaming for Mel the whole time to turn the kulunka off – I very seldom ever take a shower if he is not here for this very reason). The other option is to keep the flame low enough to match the water pressure.

Mel went into the bathroom and opened the hot water faucet in the bathtub. Then he returned to the kitchen and closed the sink faucet. Water began pouring out into the bathtub – or it should have since the hot water in the bathroom comes from the kalunka in the kitchen! Instead it began to trickle out. He turned the lever for the shower and slowly water began to trickle out of the showerhead. After 3 days in above 90-degree temps and fairly high humidity, we were both desperate for a shower. The flame was high enough to take the chill off the water, but not high enough to actually warm the water. I decided to clean the toilet while Mel showered (usually there is no problem with flushing the toilet or turning on the bathroom sink while the shower is running). I scrubbed the toilet with a super duper bleachy smelling cleaner and then flushed. Mel let out a yell – and even though there were still cleaner bubbles on the “shelf” inside the toilet, I did NOT flush it again!

He finished his shower and then it was my turn. I got in and the water pressure came up just a tiny bit. But the gas pressure remained the same (set on the lowest setting of the kalunka) and I began to shiver. “Mel!” I yelled, head covered in shampoo. “The water is too cold!” He went back into the kitchen and tried to turn the flame up. But the next notch was too high of a flame for the water pressure and the water got so hot I couldn’t even put my hand in it, much less other parts of my body. So, Mel had to stand there in front of the kitchen sink, arm up, hand holding the dial about half way between “too cold” and “too hot” until I finished my shower. I just love that man! The things he does for me!

By evening, we still had low pressure water. But Saturday morning it was full strength.

Today is Sunday. We have no water again today. Mel is preaching later out at Tsurupinsk. He is not “a happy camper.” He wants his shower before he goes out to preach (we walked to the city center last night and by the time we got home, the water was off – no shower before bed). Maybe we’ll heat up some stored water in the electric kettle, mix it with some cool water and he can at least wash his hair. Or maybe by noon it will be back on again….

Water.