Wisps of Fog

Both of my parents had birthdays this past month. I was unable to order anything for them until just today. So, I went internet shopping. I went to some of the places I usually go. Places I would imagine most people don't automatically go.
The Nature Store
Yellowstone Association Store
The Desert Southwest Store
and a variety of other places. I used to shop a lot at the National Wildlife Federation store, but it no longer exists as far as I can tell. Sad - they had some really great stuff for sale, even though I do not like their political agenda.

I looked at the Glacier National Park Association Store. One of the posters caught my eye. I paused. I looked at the thumbnail for just a few seconds, focusing on it. Like a cascade of cold mountain water, my heart and mind was drenched with a tangy-sweet wave of ... nostalgia? sadness? 'might-have-beens'? Memories - many, many memories, cascading swiftly through my mind and then slowly fading away into nothingness.

I then clicked on a site for Colorado National Monument Associate, which is where I actually found the desert southwest website. And again, the emotions, the memories, the feeling was so strong inside of me that I just closed the page out.

I want to go into the bedroom, lie down on the bed and weep an ocean of tears.

Tears for lost dreams.
Tears for memories of places I've been, natural wonders I've seen, the smell of cold clear mountain air and hot desert air, the smell of volcanic sulphur, the sound of wind raging through spruce and pine, the gentle whispers of breezes in tall dry prairie grasses.

Sweetness. Bitter sweetness.

I reach out to grasp it and my hand closes around drifting wisps of fog. An illusion.

I remember.
I remember.

I remember.

Tears.